Recovering from my heart attack has been challenging. My energy level is low and prolonged exertion is difficult. Most of the time I am good for short bursts of work, but then have to rest for a while. Trying not to be paranoid, but still be wise about listening to my body and what it is telling me and what it needs. Today I am a coin flip from driving to the ER, playing poker, or going to Costco. They all offer some appeal. Side note: went to urgent care, 4 hrs. Later checked out o.k. with referral to cardiologist next week.
I think about my life and the directions and misdirection it has taken. A pretty wild ride at times. It has often been driven by impulses and spontaneous decisions as well as some semblance of a plan. Organized chaos if you will. While it is important to live a life without regrets, I do not see how that is possible. While I am somewhat financially secure, looking back can see how much better off I could have been with better decisions, better planning. Think holding on to my Amazon, Starbucks, Microsoft and Costco stocks. I joked with my recently added financial advisor that I would have been so much better off by falling into a coma at some point in the 90's.
As we all speed ,(time does speed up as we age) towards the end, it is important to reflect both on what is, what was, and what could have been. "I coulda been a contender!". The paths not followed. We are also like Cats, "I can dream of the old days, life was beautiful then".
I think about my life and the directions and misdirection it has taken. A pretty wild ride at times. It has often been driven by impulses and spontaneous decisions as well as some semblance of a plan. Organized chaos if you will. While it is important to live a life without regrets, I do not see how that is possible. While I am somewhat financially secure, looking back can see how much better off I could have been with better decisions, better planning. Think holding on to my Amazon, Starbucks, Microsoft and Costco stocks. I joked with my recently added financial advisor that I would have been so much better off by falling into a coma at some point in the 90's.
As we all speed ,(time does speed up as we age) towards the end, it is important to reflect both on what is, what was, and what could have been. "I coulda been a contender!". The paths not followed. We are also like Cats, "I can dream of the old days, life was beautiful then".
3 comments:
Life is beautiful now - you sound a bit morose to me. Stop that!
As for time speeding up as we get older - I was reading a novel recently wherein one of the characters commented she thought time sped up because we do the same things day in and day out and we do not leave our comfort zone. If we try something new and different once in awhile, time will seem to slow back down, at least for awhile until the new/different thing becomes commonplace. Makes sense to me.
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Thanks for sharing your thoughts Phil on growing older and our lifes paths. Your dilemma of three choices is hilarious. Keep on truckin my friend and hope to see you again soon.
Mike the pick
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