On The Bubble (again)

O.K. this is now officially ridiculous.  Last night I bubbled on a 45 person tournament twice (well, once on the bubble, the other 6 away from the money).  The ironic thing was that they were both against AQ, which as we all know is a trouble hand.  The true bubble was really my fault.  I raised from the cut-off with A-10 (the big time trouble hand).  I was flat called by the button, who was the chip leader....rut row!  The flop was A-small-small, 2 clubs.  I bet half the pot, which was at least 1/2 my remaining chips and he re-raises me all-in.  I should have smelled trouble at that point and run with my remaining chips, which would probably put me all in the next time I played or in the blinds. So, pot committed and suspecting a steal raise from the chip leader, or possibly a flush draw I call...bye-bye.

The next 45 person SNG I was also in good shape with 13 remaining.  I limped in with K/10 suited, and the flop was great for me...K-J-10.  It is checked to me, I bet the pot and am re-raised all-in, by.....AQ, the flopped straight!  I of course call, and bye-bye.  I must start to respect re-raises more!!!!

Finally, a word of wisdom:  There are two secrets to success at poker.  Rule #1, never tell your secrets. 

Doctor Phil

My poker nickname is Dr. Phil.  This was started a couple of years ago by Roland, the poker room manager.  The name stuck, and lots of players have asked me over the years what "type of doctor" I am.  I have several answers, but the best one lately was provided by my wife, who suggested "Card-iologist".  Ha-Ha!  There are several doctors who play at The Moose regularly, so I think that I fit right in.

Anyway, here is a Doctor poker joke:

A Doctor answers his phone late one night and hears the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line.  "We need a fourth for poker," said the friend.

"I'll be right over", whispered the doctor.  As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, "Is it serious?" "Oh yes, quite serious," said the doctor gravely.  "In fact, there are three doctors there already!" 

One more joke:

A guy was playing 10-20 holdem and was stuck about 300 dollars when he looked down beside the table and saw a little green leprechaun.  "Quit playing poker forever right now and I'll give you a pot of gold worth a million dollars.", said the little fellow.  The player replied, "Let me get even first".  

Last new joke:

Q.  How do you get a professional poker player off your front porch?

A.  Pay him for the pizza.

Christmas Eve Bubble Boy

Christmas Eve was officially bad this year. The kids are unable to get to the beach from Portland. Helene was visiting some Mexican girls that she is tutoring and severely turned her ankle leaving their apartment. She had invited them to services at the church so Meg and I ended up taking them. Since they did not know the words to the caroles they sat quietly and listened. They had cooked some tortillas for us which were awesome, very authentic wrapped in banana leaves (I have not seen that particular item at Safeway). Anyway, everyone except me fell asleep and I watched "It's a Wonderful Life" alone while reading a book during commercials. I am really into the book, "The Pillars of the Earth", just can't put it down.

Anyway to the bubble boy part. I have lately been the bubble boy on 3 consecutive tournaments which is very frustrating! I had control of this one (18 person SNG), with top chip count most of the time. We got down to final table and I went card dead as the blinds escalated. I limped in on the button with Q-10 offsuit, the small blind (chip leader) folded and I was just against the big blind with 5 of us left (pays 4). The flop was 5/10/A with 2 diamonds. The blind checked and I bet the pot with second pair. He check raises all-in. I thought for a moment, decided that even if he had an ace that he had slow played, I had him covered by about 500 and I would not be drawing dead , but really suspected a steal. I called to see A/10, yes I was drawing virtually dead! The next hand I had QJ and blinds were next (300), so I pushed a limper and the big blind who both naturally called quickly. They both had a weak ace, the flop had 2 kings but no help for me, bye-bye bubble boy!!!

Hunting Bear at Christmas

Yesterday was an adventure, or as we call it "Bear Hunting". You know how the saying goes, "sometimes you get the bear, sometimes he gets you". Yesterday I decided that the roads had cleared enough on Hwy. 30 and I-5 to drive to Seattle to pick up Meg for Christmas. She had a reservation on Greyhound to Portland but had heard that they were taking passengers in order of reservation which meant that those cancelled trips were ahead of her. I thought it would be a great Christmas gift to drive up, pick her up, and drive right back. Also, someone who heard I was considering this told me about an older woman trying to get to Seattle to be with her family. So at 8:55 a.m. I called her, asked if she could be ready in 20 minutes (she did!), and we left by 9:30. It was not a "white knuckler" at any point in the trip and I was treated to a complete life history of my passenger. The trip took about 4 1/2 hours up and longer coming back. Mercer Street in Seattle was a parking lot and it took a half hour just to get on the freeway. Meg and I had a nice talk and drive back, getting home at 9:15. I was pretty done in (just enough energy to play in a SNG...one out of the money) and go to bed. Nice day hunting bear, he didn't get me this time.

Tax Preparation

Well, unfortunately, I do not have any gianormous tournament winnings that I have to claim on my tax returns this year. However, I do have some losses that I could claim, and am thinking of claiming a couple of players as "dependents" (Ramon for one). Also, am thinking of deducting several "contributions" I made during the year calling a check raise on the river with the board paired, 3 of a suit on the board, with my two pair or straight! Given the turn in the economy, I am thinking of cutting back on this type of charitable contribution in 2009.

Winter still has its icy grip on the coast. We are lucky not to have piles of snow on the street, last night's wind storm took care of most of that. We are, unfortunately, isolated, with Highway 26 closed and our family perhaps stuck where they are for Christmas. It is my hope that the weather will clear up long enough for everyone to get here, then let it sock in.

Week of Online Poker

I am playing mostly Omaha online these days, plus a few freeroll tournaments and low buy in tournaments. My online bankroll was doing pretty good until today. I am playing in a cash game and just cannot catch a break. I went a little on tilt, bought in for all my money and now can't sign up for SNG tournaments until I cash out, LOL!

The weather here is miserable like a lot of places around the country. It intermittently snows enough to close the schools and make driving not fun. Plus, we were planning a Portland trip this week which we had to cancel. I am doing odd jobs around the house, mailing packages for Christmas, and watching tv, though all they seem to be showing on all channels is the bad weather everywhere. I am reading a great book, "Marley and Me", and can't wait to see it when it hits the big screen. Very funny stuff. We are thinking about getting a dog, so the story is very appropriate right now.

Poker Jokes

"What is the difference between a large cheese pizza and a poker player"?
"A large cheese pizza can feed a family of four".

An older farmer took a terrible beat from a young player in a big no limit game at The Bellagio in Las Vegas. The farmer won't stop berating the young man for his terrible starting cards, his bad play, his dumb luck, etc. Everyone at the table grows sick and tired of listening to him. Finally, the young guy has had enough, he says, "Sir, if you can't afford to play at these stakes, perhaps you should find a lower limit game". The farmer stands up, shaking his fist at the young man and says, "Listen kid, I've got a ranch in Texas that is so big that I can get in my pickup truck in the morning, drive all morning, and still be on my own property". A gentleman at the other end of the table quietly comments, "I used to have a truck like that". The farmer shouts, "I don't have to take that kind of abuse!", picks up his chips and leaves. Everyone thanked the gentleman, including the dealer.

A man came home from a poker game late one night and found his hideous harpy of a wife waiting for him with a rolling pin. "Where the hell have you been?" she asked.

"You'll have to pack all your things, dear," he ad-libbed. "I've just lost you in a card game."

"How did you manage to do that?"

"It wasn't easy, honest. I had to fold with a royal flush."