BEATEN by Royal Flush

Happy Halloween!  New granddaughter, Eva & her dog, Lola  (Eva is the one on the right side)

Well, if you are going to get knocked out of a tournament, it might as well be with the mother of all monsters.  Flopping top pair, K/3 in big blind (and a really bad flush draw with the 3), I went all in, being called by A/10 offsuit, the ace was diamonds.  With both a king and queen of diamonds, he "only" needed running 10 and jack of diamonds, which he got.  Sick.

Next online tournament, fairly short stack, about 1/2 of original chips, flop two pair (K/5) in big blind, with 2 spades up I shove.  Called by Q/10 ...there was a 10 on the flop, runners for straight, J, A.  Again, sick.

Now playing in a very weird game, Royal Hold 'Em.  This is a game played 6 handed.  All of the cards below 10 have been removed.  Minimum hand to win, 2 pair , but more common minimum is straight.  You see quads, royal flushes, and full houses beaten by bigger full houses.  It is a very strange game.  Back to back hands won with quads, my jacks vs. queens full, and quad kings by another player.  This is a beatable game, but luck plays a huge part.

Sudden realization:  These online players are awful!  With little or no "skin" in the game ($19.99/mo) they are often playing any two cards hoping to get lucky.

The other game on this site is "No River Hold'em".  You are dealt 3 cards.   In this game you see a flop and turn only.  Like omaha, you can play 2 cards, or one card like hold'em, or you can play all 3. so, in my opinion the strongest hands are in order of strength:  trips (pretty rare, but have seen it), suited connectors (all 3 cards), 3 of a suit (cause you only need 2 on the board to have a flush), and finally big pairs.  Most other hands are garbage, but you can always come up with 2 pair or better.  Both of these games are not for the faint of heart, and luck plays a much bigger part than hold em.

Hands I Hate

I have this irrational hate of some hands.  Maybe I always lose with them or against them.  For whatever reason here they are:

KJ-  The mother of all hands I hate.  Why you may ask?  It is probably the hand I get knocked out of more tournaments with than any other hand.  If I shove with A/K, some jackass always seems to call with this dominated hand and spike a jack.  I shove with A/Q, no problem with K/J, I flop two pair he rivers the 10 for the straight.  If I put the shoe on the other foot and get randy with it myself I lose the the dominating K/Q, A/K or any pair.  Go figure.

My next least favorite hand is Q/10.  Also one that is so easily dominated it is ridiculous, yet has knocked me out of more tournaments than I like to remember.  Playing at Wildhorse a couple of years ago, I flopped two pair and was knocked out when called by.....wait for it........K/J who had an open ender which hit on the turn.  The very next year at Wildhorse I flop two pair with my Q/10 and yes get knocked out by J/9 two pair who fills up on the river.

Next, a really bad hand that I will never play in any position except the unraised big blind.  10/5.  This is such a miserable piece of work, never making the nuts (oh, except for maybe a freakish 10/10/10 or 5/5/5 flop.  Call me irrational (just don't call me late for dinner), but I really hate these cards.  

Oh, close to this subject....plays I hate.  There always seems to be some jackass who either shoves or raises from the blinds after there are like 5 limpers.  What the hell?  Most of the time he assuredly does not have aces.  So, he gets to play the hand, out of position, against a huge field with his raise which seldom gets rid of many players because, duh, they have position. 

Gapped Unsuited Connectors

Do you have that love-hate relationship with gapped unsuited connectors like so many of us?  Frequently I hear the "love" part of it at the poker table regarding these.  For example, Paul, the dealer, "loves" J/9, says it is his favorite hand.  Kevin, for reasons unknown, "loves" K/9 but only in cash games.  It is almost a stretch to call this connected as it will make only one straight (not counting using one card).  Others I hear as favorites are:  7/5, K/J (in a special category by itself), Q/10, and even 6/9...the happy meal.  I think that as responsible adults and poker players that we should examine these hands.

There are really different categories of gapped connectors.  1-gap, 2-gap, 3-gap.  I think that you would agree that the gap quantity makes a huge difference, but for different reasons.  First, let's look at  one gaps.

A/3
2/4
3/5
4/6
5/7
6/8
7/9
8/10
9/J
10/Q
J/K
Q/A

I would like to suggest that (extenuating circumstances notwithstanding), that most of these hands are garbage.  Beginning with A/3 you have a very weak ace.  I think you know the perils of playing this hand.  The 2 through 9 has the problem of needing to flop the "in between card" to form a straight (as do all of the one gappers).  But, they have the additional problem of never being assured of having the nut straight, plus the liability of low "high card strength".  Beginning with 10/Q we have the additional strength of high cards plus the ability to reach the nut straight.  However, the peril of these cards is simply the old problem of bad kicker.  How happy are you, really, when you flop the top pair with your hand and get a lot of action?  Unless it is A/Q, probably not so much.

What is a person to do?  Well, for starters I would suggest eliminating the unsuited one gappers below 10/Q from your repertoire.  They can always be played from the big blind, the small blind with tons of limpers, or from the button on a steal.  Otherwise, I think it prudent to avoid them.  And, when they are played, just make sure that you have the nuts or near nuts.

Now, let's explore the two gappers:

A/4
2/5
3/6
4/7
5/8
6/9
7/10
8/J
9/Q
10/K
J/A

Essentially, you have the same problem with 1 gappers.  You must flop perfect/perfect however for your straight, and it gets worse, you seldom have the nuts (though you can).  Again, high card strength trumps connectedness so the 10/K and J/A are playable under the right circumstances, with A/J third highest kicker with the ace.  We all have stories of monster pots won with these hands:  mine involves the lowly 3/6 which drug a huge 4/8 game pot against a set and two pair.  Also, you may recall my Vegas story of the folded K/10 which turned quads.  Most of the time, though, these hands are pretty unplayable.

Now, for the mother of bad hands:  the 3 gap connectors.

A/5
2/6
3/7
4/8
5/9
6/10
7/J
8/Q
9/K
10/A

We all recognize the inherent weakness of these hands, as only the A/10 can make the nut straight and with the exception of A/10 they are all pretty unplayable.  Even A/10 is right on the borderline of weak kicker territory.  What is ironic about these hands is how often you will be snapped by players who are playing the one or two gap connectors.  You get that "magic" flop of 2/3/4 playing your offsuit A/5 and get knocked out of the game by someone playing 4/6 who can't fold top pair, when the 5 hits on the turn, or worse, the player with 5/6 connectors who just lets you bet your sweet little heart out. 

So, since that knocks out a ton of hands we will be dealt in a session, next time around let's talk about suited gapped connectors. Just kidding!!!  They have the same problems plus they almost never make the nut flush!!!!!  Until next time, "May the nuts be in your hand, not surrounding you at the table" (a new saying I just made up for when I become a poker announcer replacing Norman Chad, who I can match for wittiness but perhaps not gayness).

Here is another analysis (a real one) of connectors: 

http://pokerstove.com/site/analysis/unsuited.php
  

Finally, Online Victory

For the third time since I started playing "Card Player" poker online I ended up heads-up with the lead in a big tournament.  The previous 2 times I went down in flames, always running into a monster or my opponent getting dumb lucky.  Today, I finally won (a field of around 200 players) by getting lucky against a monster flop for my opponent.  He limped, then called my A/8 button raise all-in with Q/6.  The flop was horrible for me, 5/6/Q !!!!  The turn brought some relief with a 5, then blessed river ace!  My aces up beat his queens up.  The prize you ask?  Well not really that great, just a 30 day VIP upgrade, worth about $20.  This allows me to play in some bigger $ tournaments plus some that I was excluded from.  

FONK

                                                      FONK




This morning was one of those online mornings that make you want to quit playing poker forever.  First tournament, Mr. Big Stack donk raises pre-flop with K/2 offsuit.  I re-raise all-in with A/J.  He hits a 2 on the river to knock me out.

Second tournament worse, sort of.  In the big blind with 3/4 suited, the flop is 2/5/6 with 2 hearts.  Guy raises, I go all-in, he calls with his 3/6 of hearts.  Turn is a 3, river a 6 for the full house.

Last tournament:  I raise preflop with pocket 8's, get one big stack caller.  Flop is 10 high rainbow.  Big stack goes all-in, I call, fearing the 10.  Oh, but I am in luck he has raised with J/6 offsuit...no pair, no draw.  Oh, but look who shows up for the party on the turn, a jack.  I am gone, and he adds insult to injury by typing "Bye".  I respond with my new best made-up word "FONK", which is a combination of "f'...ing" and  "donk".  Great word I think you will agree!!! Seriously considering having a hat or t-shirt made with that on it.  Maybe along the lines of "NICE CALL FONK".  You will never get in trouble with the floor by saying it, but those "in the know" will know exactly what you mean.


                                                         FONK

Chili Recipe

Due to popular request (Lynne) here it is!!!  Just one added tip:  when you deseed the jalapenos, make sure that you carefully wash your hands afterwards.  Under no circumstance should you touch your mouth or eye. LOL

Speaking from sad experience!!!!

Home Early from Legion, Rut Row

Again, I am asked to deal at the Legion, table 2 so not too late.  Collected my dealer money from 2 weeks ago, $30, which nicely offset my $40 buy-in, so with the money I will get this week, am in the black.

I am home early tonight, being knocked out before we got down to 2 tables, which sucks.  A brief recap of my night is in order.  1st hand of the tournament I deal myself A/A, raise to $100 with no limpers and only $60 in the pot.  Everyone folds.  Woot-Woot!

2nd hand I play, I am in the BB with 10/10.  Pocket Q/Q UTG min raises, and A/A on the button re-raises, we both call.  Flop is low, we check to the aces, he bets small, we both call.  Turn is a jack, again check check small bet, we both call.  River, everyone checks and he turns over the winner.

3rd hand I raise in late position with A/6 suited.  One caller.  Flop is ace high with 2 hearts.  I continuation bet and he calls.  Turn is a 6 giving me 2 pair, he checks, I bet pot.  He calls.  River third heart hits, I check he goes all-in.  I wait, he says, I'll show, I fold, he had flopped an open ended straight flush draw.  No bet would have deterred him.

Now short stacked, a player raises my big blind to $300 (blinds at $60/120), I call with KQ of clubs.  Flop is J/J/10 with two clubs, giving me the open ended straight flush draw.  I go all-in for my last $400 or so and he insta-calls with his flopped boat, J/10 offsuit.  Now, as the dealer I need to pull out my two outer but fail. Dealer down!!!  Well that sucked.  Victim of draws.

Blogging is a Tough Life

I am just so thoroughly bored (and boring) lately.  With all of the work being done on the house I just sit around and play on my computer.  Well, and lately cook chili.  Have this great recipe for turkey & bean chili.     Made a huge pot on Tuesday and served it to the workmen on Wednesday.  They really enjoyed it as the weather was awful, pouring rain and cold.  Also made some cornbread muffins....from the box, Trader Joe's.

So, there was just a little leftover for us, so made another giant pot today.  We are freezing half of it and eating the rest.  Sadly, out of cornbread mix, so will have to come up with another side dish.

Playing these crap games on card player poker.  Keep winning entries into the finals but missing the money.  Going deep almost every time but just can't seem to cash.  Right now am in a qualifier for "Thanksgiving Family Feast" final, don't know what the prizes are or when it will be held.  Hold on, just got knocked out in third place with my 10/10 vs. A/J.  Oh, well, still earned a seat for the final and a few chips to boot.....top 8 places qualified.

Vegas Baby!!

This was a "different" Vegas visit for me.  My usual trip consists of planting my fat ass in a poker chair for 14 hours a day and never "visiting" a casino just to sight-see.  On this trip I was accompanied by my son-in-law, Vinay, and his mother, father, and grandfather who were visiting from India.  Determined to be a good host I dutifully escorted everyone to The Venetian, Caesar's Palace, Paris, Bally's, Aria, Cosmopolitan, Planet Hollywood, etc.  I have never walked as much in my life.  We enjoyed the buffet dinners, but could not interest anyone in the breakfast buffet, my personal favorite.  Caesar's was supposed to be the highlight, and it was the most expensive.  We timed it bad, getting in line at 7:30 at the end of the rush and had to wait almost 1 1/2 hours to be seated.  Not my idea of a good time, but the food was excellent and we definitely worked up an appetite waiting so long.

I had suggested that the most beatable game was blackjack, so Vinay studied basic strategy beforehand and really got into it.  He is a disciplined player, not varying from basics and also sticking to good bankroll management practices.  He had several winning sessions, only one or two small losers and finished up for the trip.  Good job Vinay!!  The downside is that he got pretty hooked on both that game and Vegas plus decided quickly that blackjack is a net loss game so is now interested in learning poker (guess blackjack is a gateway drug).  I promised that I would give him so reading material on the game and show him the ropes.  With his discipline, brains, and youth he could be a great player.

How did I do on the trip you ask?  Well, had a couple of small losing sessions, not more than a couple of hundred.  I could tell you the beats but frankly there were just too many.  Played mostly 1/3 no limit with one 4/8 thrown in for good measure and old time's sake (had a $60 win in that session, played only one hand, the first one when I sat down against a monster stack aggressor and rivered a flush against his two pair).  Had my aces and kings cracked by flushes, quad queens, and Q/10.  Pocket aces cracked stacked me twice.  Had a calling station that would not quit on a flush draw despite very incorrect odds.  The queens re-raised me all-in preflop and went runner runner queens for high hand money quads.  double ouch!!!  

I played in two tournamenst at the Mirage.  The first one ($65 buy-in), made the final table short stacked and drew the under the gun seat.  The small blind raised me all-in with AK and I called with A5 suited.  Player down 4 out of the money.  The next day, same tournament I chopped the $1900 pot 5 ways as chip leader.  We were leaving in a couple of hours so just wanted to finish.  Plus there were bad beats aplenty.  My Vegas record now stands at 5 tournament wins/cashes out of last 6 trips.

I had several nice winning sessions in the $150-$200 range, coming back once from stuck $200 to cash out for $170.  Overall, came home with about the same amount I left with after taxi rides, meals for 5 people, tips and miscellaneous, so would call it a good 4 days.  Most importantly, the Indian family had a wonderful time and I actually played significantly less poker than normal (one session, the tournament, was while they saw a show).  I sincerely tried to just be a good "host" and tour guide rather than my usual poker junkie self.  

      I believe that if I rid myself of insatiable cravings, lusts, paranoia, deep-seated anger and ill-will towards others, I'll be a much better person.  Chuck Lorre.   

Good Tournament Luck

It is amazing sometimes how luck plays such a major part in your tournament life (or death).  Let me cite a few examples from last night's American Legion tourney.

On a flop of 5/5/K, a very loose and poor player bets a little over min bet with his 5/7.  He is called by K/6, I fold my K/4.  The turn is a blank, the bad player bets another small bet which is called.  The river is a king, he bets again, the nuts raises, he calls and loses the pot.  One outer time for the king and unbelievably poorly played by the 5/7.  I was dealing, and regretting not playing the hand as I would have shoved with the nuts and probably the bad player would have called off all his chips.

Next luck example, on the final table a player raises with J/J, he is called by 10/10.  Another player, one of the deep stacks re-raises all-in with J/J (yes there were two of them).  Everyone calls and the river brings a 10.  Two outer victory.

Later, the same player who won with his 10's is in the small blind with K/K.  One player limps, I have A/10 on the button.  I raise, hoping to take the pot down or isolate the limper.  The kings re-raises all-in and I call, figuring he may be on a squeeze play.  Ooooh, hate to see those kings, but lately they have been trouble for me.  The flop brings no help to me, but the turn offers help, a 10 plus now a flush draw.  The river is another 10 for my lucky win.

Later, the same player is eliminated with A/A when a four flush is on the board and the opponent has the flush card.  Ouch.

Saw several like that, lost to J/8 with my K/J when he hit an 8 when we were down to 5 players.  Good news at the end, as the chip leader (me) proposed a 5 way chop of $205 each (nobody had more that 10 big blinds) with $20 each going to dealers.  Since I was a dealer for table 2, will get 30% of $100 for a net cost in tournament of only $10 and a net profit of $195. 

Seduced by the Bounty

The Monday morning Moose tournament is interesting because it has a $100 bounty on the casino employee playing in it.  Last Monday, Roland, the poker room manager was "it".  I was running entirely card dead, not playing a single hand other than a couple of limp/folds when Roland, who had taken a substantial hit, decided to push all-in with his AQ.  With $100 on the line, he got 5 callers, including me in the big blind with my Q/7 of clubs.  The flop was ace high with one club and a 7.  O.K, but not great and with this many callers figured someone would bet.  Nope.  Checked around.  The turn was a great card for me, another club, giving me flush draw.  Everyone checked around to a lady who declared all-in, and shoved enough chips to cover my call.  The river failed to produce a club and I was gone, while her 2/3 offsuit won the pot plus the bounty.

I don't regret making the call, as I was getting great odds on my draw, both in tournament chips and 4/1 on my $25 buy-in.  What I do regret was not pushing on the flop when I hit my 7 which should have elicited a fold from her.  Roland would then have won the pot but I would have only lost about 1/4 of my chips and he would still be in the tournament for me to knock out later.  Moving to the cash game I played for 1 1/2 hours without raking a pot.  Not a good day of poker.

Quad 8's, A-Hole player

Another marathon session on Thursday.  Running very badly, am down about $300 when I hit quad 8's in a raised pot.  Flopped them, so was able to relax and figure out how to maximize profit.  Check, call, check call, check raise.  Nice hand worth $499 plus a good sized pot.  Despite the win, ended up breaking even.....had a 75/25 split deal with my buddy, Ron and just donkied off some chips with my pocket aces and pocket jacks.  The worst one was with Thuy, I raised with AA, Chris goes all in for $15 more with JJ, and Thuy decides to tag along with 6/9.  Naturally, she hits a 9 on the flop and a 6 on the river.  Oh, well, only a $25 loss....could have been worse.  Also snapped on a 3/3/x flop against A/3, also calling a big preflop raise.  Small wonder both of these players usually are "donating".

Now to the A-Hole story.  Very conservative player sitting to my immediate left, in his '70's.  His wife also playing, same game.  Would call their style tight, passive.  Saw her win several pots with the nuts, but never raised even once (except preflop twice with A/A).  These guys might as well play their hands face up in my opinion, too easy to fold against them.  Anyway, the guy hits quads (I had raised preflop with J/J) on a flop of 10/10/x.  I should have made an easy read and fold but had been playing for 10 hours and just too tired to  figure it out.  Anyway, he makes some comment to me after the hand about how "You have been stealing pots on the button all night, partner" .  I was offended by the use of the word partner, not the stealing part which was technically correct if you call raises in late position and continuation bets stealing, I call it good poker not "low limit showdown".  So, I called him on the use of partner, saying "don't call me partner, I wouldn't want to be your partner in any enterprise".  He then makes some remark about how "the little guys always have the big mouths" which frankly I could not understand since he was both shorter and weighed less than me.  So, I responded with "you got that right".  About this time the dealer was giving me the evil eye and I just quit talking.  He left the game shortly afterwards.  If I ever play on the same table with him and if he ever says a word to me will call for the floor (which I should have done) and have them give him a warning.  Nobody needs to put up with that BS.    

Poker Marathon

Yesterday was a marathon for me.  Driving in from Seattle (fully rested from 4 hour drive), I sit down for some poker.  Playing squeaky tight (think folding small blind in a family pot), I "graduate" to the main table with basically my $100 buy-in intact.  Big mistake moving.  Within an hour at the other table there are quads dealt twice to the same player ($499 Monte for each), and a royal flush ($1500).  Nice table change.  We finally get one at our table, not me, the player to my immediate left.

This table is sooooo beatable.  Watching sick bluffs and folks calling down with bottom pair.  Running very card dead.  Pick up KK and get 4 callers with my raise.  C-bet on a 10/10/2 board and get two callers.  My spidey sense is telling me kings no good.  I check the turn, Jerry bets $20, Anh calls, I fold.  River, Jerry bets, Anh calls, Jerry has pocket aces.  Good fold.  Folded kings earlier to Anh's aggression bad fold then.

Anyway, I eventually lose my $100, re-buy for $50, and eventually cash out for......$150 exactly.  Only problem is the eventually ends up being 2:15 a.m. That's right, 10 hours of poker to break even.  Oh well, got my "free" dinner & coffee all night.  Good Grief!!!